December 19, 2010

Oh the neglect...

Geek Girl, oh how I neglect thee! It has been a rough few weeks.  I need a new computer.  I need a new body.  The excuses are endless.

December 6, 2010

Wikilinks Mirror Site!

Wikilinks has been shut down! But mirror sites are being put up like this one:



Ex-Pat Pottymouth

How do you move to another country without sucking dick? I don't want to live here anymore.

December 5, 2010

Ridiculous New iPhone App I am Obsessed With

Scar Progress - December 5, 2010

Is it me, or has the healing process hit a plateau?


FINALLY watched The White Ribbon.  Needed to wait until I was in the proper frame of mind (somber, helpless, depressed).  I have been saying this for years, but now I think it is safe to announce publicly that MICHAEL HANEKE IS THE GREATEST LIVING/ACTIVE FILMMAKER!

November 29, 2010

The Pee-wee Herman Show! Live! On Broadway!

Last weekend, a lifelong dream of mine finally came true.  Not only did I see the interior of Pee-wee's Playhouse in the flesh (although it was most likely made out of formica), but I even breathed the SAME AIR as the one and only Pee-wee Herman!

I heard late last year that Paul Reubens had revived his Pee-wee character for a limited run of The Pee-wee Herman Show at the Roxy in Los Angeles.  I tried to find someone to accompany me out there for it, but there were no takers.  Not that I had to go with someone, but if I was going to see Pee-wee, nevermind the whole playhouse - I would need someone there to pinch me so I would know it was really happening!

I have been a die hard Pee-wee fan ever since his show Pee-wee's Playhouse began airing when I was six years old.  Some of my favorite childhood memories were of my Dad and I watching it together on Saturday mornings.  And not until recently - when I decided to rewatch some of the original Playhouse episodes - did I realize how much his show had an impact on my personality.  Everything from my taste and my sense of humor, to my love of kitsch, social commentary and all that's gay - seems to have been influenced by his show.  The music on the show was even made by Mark Mothersbaugh, the leader of what would eventually be one of my all time favorite bands, Devo! It was obvious that Pee-wee penetrated my very psyche in ways that I had not yet realized.

And when his 1991 arrest went down for masturbating in an adult theater in Florida, I was crushed.  Reubens denies the allegation, but it never mattered to me, even as a kid.  I was so upset for the way the media crucified him and made him look like some sort of creepy pedophile just because he had his own children's show.  Nobody does that to my Pee-wee! Here's an excerpt of me preachin' on his behalf in one of my zines when I was just a kiddo:

So, when I heard earlier this year that due to the success of his L.A. show, there would be a month long run of The Pee-wee Herman Show on Broadway, I had to be there! As soon as tickets went on sale, I grabbed two tickets right in the front for a whopping $500! I didn't care how much it cost me - I wanted to see Pee-wee's pores! Up close and personal with Pee-wee!!!

And even after my injury this year and all the hell I have been through, I refused to miss his show and even scheduled my surgery so I would have enough physical therapy and recovery time in order to make it down to New York.  We will never forget Pee-wee!

And it was well worth every penny and all the struggle for me to physically get there.  First of all, Macaulay Culkin walked into the lobby right in front of me and I can't believe how goofy I got.  I never realized what a Macaulay Culkin fan I was, but I suppose it was because of what a huge star he was when I was little.  Oh, and he was there with Seth Green.  Meh.  Not so much.

 (Above: Yours truly with a teeny tiny Macaulay Culkin and Seth Green over my shoulder.)

Once my friend and I were seated and the lights went down... Pee-wee came out, and the only light in the room was a spotlight on him standing in front of the curtain RIGHT IN FRONT OF US... and then the curtain was raised to see THIS:

(Above: The magical stage from The Pee-wee Herman Show.  I couldn't find a picture of the Broadway set so here is one from the show earlier this year in Los Angeles.  Deal with it Missie!)


The second that curtain went up, I felt like a little kid again, filled with wonder and excitement.  It was the playhouse right before my very eyes! Chairry was there, and Conky, Clockey, Mr. Window, Pterri, Globey, Magic Screen and even that bad ass Randy! Out of the original cast there was Miss Yvonne and Jambi, original characters like Cowboy Curtis and the King of Cartoons made an appearance and there were a bunch of new faces as well.  There was even a Penny stop-motion cartoon shown on a screen that lowered down and an 1960's era instructional film which taught the crowd about good manners (with special sound effects added - hee hee).  

I don't want to talk too much about the details of the plot or my favorite bits of the show in case you are going! I hate spoilers.

After the show was over, we waited by the stage door to see if Pee-wee would eventually come out.  And low and behold he did! Armed with a handheld loudspeaker, he talked about what a great audience we were and how much each show really means to him.  He kept repeating this over and over and spoke so earnestly about how he doesn't want us to think he takes his fans or anything for granted and how our support is so special to him.  Then he said, "I think you guys are really cool."

Then the crowd was silent for a few seconds.  So I yelled, "We think you're cool too Pee-wee!" Just like Miss Yvonne or Chairry would.  It was awesome.  Awww, shucks Pee-wee.  Thanks for such an unforgettable night!

November 16, 2010

I Love You!

If you're reading this, I just want you to know right now, mi amor - that I love you!!!


Seriously, if you're taking the time to read this nonsense I better snatch you up while I can.

November 13, 2010

Please remind me to stop talking to my mother.

Is it just me or do mothers have the inherent superpower to make you completely anxious about every aspect of your existence, within a mere 2 minutes of speaking with them? Even when you try to change the subject to something light, fluffy - meaningless even - does your mother continue to take you down the darkest of dark paths like mine does? Please someone remind me to stop talking to her.

It seems only fitting to add an excerpt from my first zine - Geek Patrol! - here, that I wrote about the woman herself back in 1995.  Upon reflection, it seems as though things haven't changed much!

Scar Progress - November 13, 2010


Not quite sure what is going on with my scar at the moment.  Doesn't seem like it has improved too much in the past couple of weeks.  Part of my physical therapy is to massage around it every night so it heals properly and the muscle and tissue around it readjust.  I am still doing the Mederma and Vitamin E oil regimen everyday... To be continued!!!

Scar Progress - November 4, 2010

Facebook Death

What do you do when a Facebook/Myspace friend passes away? Keep them? For how long? Do social networking profiles last forever?

November 5, 2010

The Best Voicemail Message I Have Ever Received

My friend Phil and I were in NYC for the Ponderosa Stomp at Lincoln Center earlier this summer.  After the concert, we parted ways at around 11:00pm and I went back to my hotel.  When I woke up the next morning, there was a voicemail message from him on my phone.  It was left around 3:30am, so at first I thought maybe he got locked out of his friend's apartment or something bad happened.  Then I played the message...

NOW I thought Phil was a comic genius, who got some crazy guy on the street to leave this hilarious message just for me! Thanks Phil! I played it a few times over and over and just kept laughing hysterically.  It wasn't until later that night that I discovered (via Facebook) that his phone was stolen! Turns out the thief called a few of his female friends in his contacts that night and left sexxee messages similar to mine.  Oh man.  This still cracks me up.  But one mystery remains... how did he know that I am white?

Halloween Recap!

As you know by now, Halloween is my favorite holiday and I take the choice and creation of my costume very seriously! Last year, I won 1st place in the Halloween Costume Contest at local club called T.T. and the Bear's - so this year I had to return to try to reclaim my crown.
If you have known me at any point since I was a teenager, you probably know that I am obsessed with the television show "Twin Peaks," created by David Lynch and Mark Frost back in 1990.  So obsessed in fact, that I once took a Greyhound bus 54 hours straight from Chicago to Snoqualmie, WA where it was filmed.  I stayed in Snoqualmie for a week, seeing all the sites I could from the show and subsequent film Fire Walk With Me.  Some sites, like where the "Welcome to Twin Peaks" sign was in the television show (but not actually there in reality, obviously), took a whole day to walk to from town.  Then at night I would walk through the woods with a flashlight, carrying a boom box playing the "Twin Peaks" soundtrack, and scaring the bejeezus out of myself.  It doesn't get much dorkier than this people!

If you haven't seen the show, first of all, you should! But for those of you who haven't seen it, it revolves around the murder of a small town homecoming queen named Laura Palmer.  In the pilot, her dead body is found washed up on the shore of a lake (naked and wrapped in plastic).  So while the main plot of the show is "Who Killed Laura Palmer?" and in many ways she is the main character, she is never actually on the show except in the occasional flashback.  This helps add to the mystery of her character and intriguing circumstances surrounding her death.

I have always identified with Laura Palmer for some reason, and since this year it was the 20th anniversary of the show, I decided it was time to finally be her!

(Above: Yours truly as bad girl Laura Palmer.  I think I look prettier than the Mona Lisa herself here, if I do say so myself!) 

It wasn't easy, let me tell you.  But I think I pulled it off.  It took me about two full days to get everything together to make the "dress," custom purse and shoes.

(Above: Customized purse and boots made entirely out of clear plastic and white duct tape.  Perhaps not historically accurate to the "real" Laura Palmer, but inspired by her fabulous dead body!)

(Above: Getting in the Halloween spirit with a little tap dance halfway through the costume creation process - October 29, 2010.)

Last Saturday, it was time to go to the club where one year before I had won 1st place for my rendition of Stephen King's Carrie.  But as I was walking around on the way there, people kept stopping me and asking me if I was Lady Gaga! It was then that I realized that if you didn't know who Laura Palmer was -- that I did actually look kind of like Lady Gaga! Oh no! Things were not looking good for me in my pursuit to win the costume contest, unless everyone there really likes Lady Gaga!

After I arrived, I did a little constricted dancing, and then the DJ announced that there was only 10 minutes left before the contest began.  I was at least going to give it a shot (I had to show off all my hard work!), but didn't want to get my hopes up about winning.  Laura Palmer is a pretty obscure costume.  In comparison to last year, practically everyone knows who Carrie is -- and no one wants Carrie to lose... because who knows what could happen to those in attendance if she did!

I got in line for the bathroom, and while I was waiting there, out walked a girl dressed as another character from "Twin Peaks," Audrey Horne! I couldn't believe it! We just paused and looked at each other and were like, "AWESOME!!!" She told me that her boyfriend was there and that he was dressed as yet another character from "Twin Peaks" too... Special Agent Dale Cooper! I was psyched! I immediately suggested that we all enter the contest as a group, because we would be unstoppable! They were more than happy to oblige me.

(Above: Meet F.B.I. Special Agent Dale Cooper and Miss Audrey Horne.  Them + me = the Twin Peaks trifecta - a brilliant strategy to win the costume contest!) 

When the contest started we all met together on stage.  There were anywhere from 30-40 people entered, so the stage was packed.  Each person had to walk up to the emcee and say into the microphone what their costume was, then wait to hear how loud the applause was for them.  When our newly formed posse went up, the crowd went wild! More people must have known about "Twin Peaks" than I thought! One by one, the contestants with the least applause were asked to leave the stage, and then the cycle began again.  It was goodbye to all the clowns first (people don't like them), then the kind of nerdy stuff like avatars and robots, then to the sexy Raggedy Ann doll, sexy cigarette girl, sexy transit card (?!), etc.  This went on for quite some time, until the only ones left standing were us and a girl dressed as Tippi Hedren from The Birds.  The applause for Tippi finally beat us out, so she won 1st place and we came in 2nd.  We even won $60 and a beautiful little trophy that Audrey and Cooper were nice enough to let me keep.  The funny thing is that Tippi's outfit is a pre-packaged costume that I have seen at a bunch of stores and even on friends of mine! Oh well.  All and all another Halloween to remember, and I kept my costume crown (kind of)!

November 3, 2010

Summer 2010 Photography!

Here are (I think!) my best photos of the past summer.  There are so few because of my injury this year, but they are certainly worth posting anyway!

To see even MORE great pictures from the past summer (and beyond!), check out my Flickr page: